The Second Chance I Didn’t Deserve
Blake Anderson’s Heartbreaking Story of Losing His Wife to Breast Cancer and His Reason for Hope
Today, we’re taking some time to step away from the X’s and O’s to hear the personal story behind the game.
Blake Anderson is the head coach of Arkansas State University. He has had immense success on the football field, leading the program to six consecutive winning seasons, six straight bowl appearances, and back to back Sun-Belt Conference championships in 2015 and 2016.
Off the field, many College Football fans know about the tragic story of his wife Wendy’s battle with breast cancer and her passing last year. As Blake shared with us today, it is the adversity he has faced off the playing field and the second chances he’s been given that have shaped him into the coach, father, believer, and ultimately the man that he is today. Listen in to our conversation today…
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Episode Transcript
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Henry Kaestner: Blake, thank you very much for being on the Faith Driven Athlete podcast. We have a lot to cover, but I want to start right from the beginning. You played quarterback for Baylor and Sam Houston State before beginning a career in coaching. Where did the passion for football begin?
Blake Anderson: You know, as a gym rat, my dad traveled a lot. He was in the insurance business and traveled a lot. My mom was a teacher. So every day when I get done with school and elementary and both junior high, I'd ride the bus over to the high school where she was working. And I would drive the coaches crazy, whatever sport they were coaching. I was knee deep in the middle of it, was even practicing with a high school team when I was in junior high, just gym rat. And I love competition, love play. But along the way, I think as I got closer to playing college ball couple, my high school coaches really just made an impact on me and even one of my college coaches. Blair Philbrick, who was actually the same you state Mike Lucas, who was on our staff. They really just kind of poured into my life and really encouraged me that I mean, when football's over, this might be something you want to do. And just they were great Christian guys that were able to kind of blend the two. My high school coach, Larry Hargrove, had done the same thing, just what I'd always been around when I realized I wasn't good enough to play anymore. The next best thing was to be involved with it and be around it and coach and just lit me up. So I jumped into it. Really fortunate to get into it at the collegiate level and have been scrambling all across the country ever since.
Henry Kaestner: So talk to us about that. Talk to us about the early days, your coaching career. So, you know, you love the sport. You love being around the camaraderie and fellowship of the team. You know, love competing. But you start, I believe, what, eastern New Mexico and then rose through the ranks fairly quickly, what was that early journey in that success like?
Blake Anderson: Well, nobody ever dreamed of starting their career in New Mexico, that much I can promise you. Wendy and I were engaged. We're gonna get married. We loaded up and we left Huntsville. We're finishing up, playing at Sam. There weren't any G.A. spots at Sam Houston State I was gonna try to hang around and wait for one to open and there's just no guarantees. And the phone rings and really had to make a decision quickly, like it's your job and you got to be here like next week. So we literally load up everything we had, drove like 15 hours to Portales, New Mexico, and no offense to anybody that's listening, that lives in Portales, but it's not the edge of the earth but you can see it from there kind of place. And it was the shock. It really was making six thousand dollars a year. G.A. Wendy's waiting tables. That's right. I'm working extra jobs, you know, in the summer to pay the bills and worked in a Coca-Cola factory. So nothing glamorous about my beginning in really most, you know, over the next, I don't know, ten years or so. It was the same thing. It was jobs that don't pay very much, doing everything I can to put food on the table, Wendy working every job she can do and started raise kids bouncing around. We just you know, we knew we wanted to coach, you know, we really weren't expecting to make all a lot of money. So it didn't surprise us, but it was hard.
Henry Kaestner: And a graduate assistant for those who don't know you also got to do a lot of different travel, right?
Blake Anderson: Oh I was on the road a ton. And you got to take classes. I was working on a masters degree too. So you're working on a Masters, you're traveling to recruit your coach in a position and you're making no money. So you scrounged in every penny that you can. We're blessed. My parents did everything they could to help us to finish my degree. Actually got hired full time within a few years of being a G.A., you know, at the lower levels. And kind of I think we're started really cut my teeth was in nineteen ninety four. Ninety five. I got hired at Trinity Valley Community College, two year school.
We're living in the dorm running the athletic dorm. Got a little one on the ground already, another one on the way. We're making thirty thousand dollars a year, eat cafeteria food every chance because it was free and you spent five years there and really kind of figured out what I was doing, recruited well, met a lot of people and got my opportunity from there to actually move to the Division One level, which started at University of New Mexico.
Rocky Long didn't know me. I had a couple guys staff that did. One of them was a teammate, couple of guys I had recruited against. And they just recommended me because I'd done a really good job recruiting. And, you know, that's what got me in the door. They gave me a chance. And I've been at the division one level ever since in some capacity.
Henry Kaestner: So you walk away from Coaching now, June 1st, 2005. Tell us about that decision, what happened leading up to it and how do you decide to give it off on that day?
Blake Anderson: Well, the most important decision I've made in my career and my marriage, really what led up to it was just years of not really living, you know, the right way, not really doing my job the way God intended it to be done. You know, I felt when I was little, I had to grow up in a godly home and I accepted Christ at an early age. And I had that experience. I know it was genuine, but I got away from that. And I really wasn't prepared for what college football, the lifestyle, the travel, the being gone and being away, being on the road. I went really prepared for what that was going to look like and how I was going to respond to it, I think. Well, it's football. Or if you're a business man that travels a lot and you're away, just there's opportunity and freedom that jumps up and is right there in front of you. And you can if you're not prepared, you know what your answer is going to be when those opportunities present themselves, you're potentially going to make the wrong decision. I did. I just bought into the life on the road kind of lifestyle, and it was really prevalent in this particular profession. A lot of the guys that I respected were knee deep in the middle load of hanging out and kind of acting like a frat guy. And, you know, it just took a toll on our marriage. I ended up at a point where we were in the same house together, raising kids together, but we didn't like each other a whole lot. I felt myself just kind of joined the road and really that lifestyle.
And it eventually kind of followed me back home. I was making decisions that weren't honoring God, weren't honoring my marriage or my kids. Was a great recruiter and was moving up the ranks in college ball. I was getting opportunities at other places and moving up. But everything behind the scenes really fallen apart. And I found myself in an affair outside my marriage. So with my marriage actually falling apart and about to lose my wife and kids and just thankfully, people that really knew me, I think my parents knew that I was kind of burning at both ends. My wife obviously didn't know exactly what my life was, but she knew it wasn't what God wanted.
And some good people, good friends around me that could tell. Just continue to pray for me. And God finally just broke me and brought me to my knees. That summer, I just was ashamed who it was. I mean, I'd never planned to be in that kind of a husband or father, you know, never planned on being unfaithful and never planned on being a workaholic and not doing the things that I was supposed to do as a husband and as a father. And so, yeah, my parents would give me great examples. And they're still together today, 55 years later. And so I knew what it was supposed to be. So it's just easier to realize that that's not who I was. And so I just I really crumble. And I told my wife, you know, this is who I've been. I know you're fixed to leave and you should. But I don't want to be that person anymore. And God's broken me. And I will tell you right now, I will walk in and resign tomorrow and walk away from this profession if you will stay. And we can work on our relationship. If I can get back to my relationship with Christ and I can get back to being a father and by grace of God she loved God more than she did me and she stay and she said, I'll do it. And so I literally walked in the next day without any warning. I'm the offensive coordinator at a Division One school and literally opportunities presenting themselves. You recently turned down a job and another one was kind of round the corner. I mean, I walked away at a really hot part of my career, but it was the only chance I had to save my marriage and my family and really to get my relationship with Christ back on track. And so I walked out of Coach's office. He thought I was crazy. We sold our house and we moved back to Texas and we just started working on it. I ran my dad's business for a couple of years while he was getting over a heart attack. He wasn't feeling real well, kind of worked his business and kept it afloat, selling life insurance and recruiting life insurance agents in Texas and played a lot of with ball in the back yard with the kids. And we did marriage counseling. We dug into the word and just got my life back on track, got our marriage back on track and became best friends again. Remembered why we got married in the first place and we started doing life together, doing our spiritual walk together and just trying to enjoy what God had. I truly never knew if I would ever coach again. I expected that when I walked away, that was it. And couple of years later, when the phone rings and I get an opportunity, it was complete shock to me that God was presenting an opportunity for me to get back into coaching. And you can imagine my wife shocked as well.
Justin Forman: Thanks for sharing that because it's powerful stuff. It is interesting as we are in story and just kind of what God was doing through there. It's incredibly interesting to also see. Yeah. Phone rings You're sitting on the couch selling life insurance and you get that call. What was different the second time around that made you say yes to that opportunity?
Blake Anderson: Well, I always felt like during the process of rebuilding my relationship with Christ and Wendy and I rebuilding our marriage I felt like God had put me in coachingd for a reason I just had ignored it and missed that opportunity the first time. I don't feel like I just chose football. I feel like it kind of chose me. That's where God was moving me, that he gave me the ability to be good at it. He gave me the desire to be around it. The career I'd had, the people I'd met, it put me in a position to use a platform. And I just really did. I just hadn't used it. And I think we just felt like as we prayed about it and talked about it, that God was truly giving us an opportunity to use the platform. It's given us a second chance at it. But, you know, way that was gonna work is if we did it and put God first. And so we prayed a lot. And you got to give a tremendous amount of credit to Wendy because knowing, what she knew about the lifestyle and just, you know, the time that I was never home, obviously wasn't live and right when I was gone to be faithful enough to what God was asking us to do, to step back in and to truly trust that I would do it the way God intended then was just a huge leap of faith on her part. And we made the decision together to take the job and step back into coaching, but promising each other and promising God that we would put him first, put family second in the football aspect would have to come third. And we've done that over the last 15 years. And I've had a more fun coaching than I've ever had. And I watch God work in some huge ways.
Justin Forman: Coach, I appreciate you sharing everything that you shared with us there about that journey and which you guys went through the healing that took place. It's one thing to hit the road again and a new opportunity with the intentions of doing good. But it's another thing to rebuild that trust, to have some of those checks, to have some of those things to it, to rebuild trust in your relationship. What did that look like as you started to travel again and when he knew you were on the road? What did it look like to rebuild that trust?
Blake Anderson: It was hard. I'll be honest, it was hard for Wendy I'm sure. It took a game plan. Truly, you know, I'll tell guys all the time that I've never gone into a practice or a game of my career without a practice schedule, a game plan or practice plan. But I have gone into life really just kind of winging it for a long time. And so when we got back in, we had to be really intentional about what are we going to do? What things do we have to have up front? I had to talk to the coach about what I needed my schedule to look like as the offensive coordinator, what control I needed to have and what I was going to bring. My family was going to be a part. I went on the road recruiting. I had to make sure Wendy knew where I was going to be, I had to give her the phone number. Call her from the room. I did quit going out and eating with the guys. I would grab food, take it back to the room. I had to be really intentional about protecting myself in the environment I was in because I didn't want to be tempted to go hang with the guys. I don't want to be tempted to pick up some girl at the sports bar. I didn't want to become the workaholic again that didn't spend time with his families.
So you had to put just goals and kind of check marks in place to make sure that we were going to truly do it the way we said it. And I was fortunate to work for guys that listen when I told them those things were important. They allowed me to have the freedom I needed to. And now there were times that we still had to work. I'm not afraid of hard work. And God tells us to have a great work ethic. I think Colossians three twenty three tells it pretty clear to me, work hard, you know, work with all your might do it like do it for God, not for people but. So there were times that the hours were a challenge, but I think it was the motivation and the intent and then just the communication between myself and her and then my bosses about exactly what we were doing and how we're doing. And so I think God honored that and allowed us to really just kind of build trust back. It got easier, I think, for her as we went along. I got better at it, at communicating, I think to her, too, and just making sure that she didn't have to worry, that she knew exactly where I was, what I was doing while I was doing it, and that I respected what they had to look like for her back home waiting on me to get there.
Justin Forman: Coach, I heard you recently share a convention and talking about how you got a second chance that you didn't deserve and you got an opportunity to do that. And you've kind of broken down your career into some of the things before you look at some of the things moving forward when you think about moving forward in the next chapters. What do you want your career to be known for now as a head coach?
Blake Anderson: I mean, I want to be good at my job like anybody. But honestly, when I'm done and I walk away, you know, guys, too many really impacted my life for something other than just ball. And I just I want to know God and to make God known through football through my job. I want guys on my staff, guys on my team coaches that I come in contact with to think that dude loves the Lord and loves ball and knows what he's doing. You know, my relationship with him made me want to know God. Made me want to be different. Made me want to find perspective Priorities in my life. I mean, those are the things that really feel my heart. It's I want to win championships. Heck, yeah. We've won a couple. I'd love to win a bunch more. I'd love to win a national title. All those things, but not as much as really I just want to see God use the platform that he's given me in big, big ways. And so wherever that is that he takes me, whether it's here the rest of my career at the power five level NFL or it's back down to junior college. I want God to be front and center. And so, you know, that's never been more evident to me than just my perspective over the last couple years. Losing Wendy and just this is short lived. This our life here on Earth is a vapor. It's a mess. It's going to go quickly. And I don't want to waste a second of it for trophies that rust can tarnish. I will spend it for God if I can.
Henry Kaestner: The Bible tells us to mourn with those who mourn, and you just talked about the recent passing of your wife. We mourn those who've gotten to know you mourn as well. And as you guys had come back together and something became really, really beautiful. Can you tell us about some of that journey and how that last year, this last year's test of your faith and how you're holding up?
Blake Anderson: Well, I can. You know, we got together in college and weren't really looking for each other and just literally fell in love very quickly. We became really good friends. We became best friends and had great intentions. So how we're going to do lives and, you know, just in honor of that, I just wasn't prepared. I did a really poor job. You mentioned that I did get a second chance. I got a second chance of being a husband. I got a second chance of being a father. I got a second chance at being a coach and didn't feel like I deserved any of those. Just buy again a godly wife and an amazing God. I got those. And, you know, once I got out and just really kind of just broke and changed. We got back to being best friends and we truly did. My career and this whole football thing together, I'd done it by myself for the first half. And she kind of raised the kids, did her thing, and I did mine. We decided we're going to do this together and we did every aspect of it together. We just got closer and closer, loved each other more and more. I think I truly became a good husband and father along the way. And we were very happy. And when she was diagnosed, we knew it was gonna be a really rough battle. We knew that God could heal her if he chose to here on Earth, or he could heal her and take her home. She knew the Lord and was just a rock to hold me up. Just a huge accountability partner as well. And so our faith was in him. You know, we didn't want her to go. We wanted her to stay here and raise kids and grandkids together. But we knew that we were in for a tough battle and that there was possibility that he might not heal her. And so our faith was never in question. We trusted him completely. We we hurt. And it was hard to watch. And she suffered and it was brutal. But her faith and her peace and knowing that she'd be with him the second she took her last breath. My faith in the same thing, knowing that we're just going to enjoy every second that he gives us, but also cling to the fact that we're going to get to spend eternity together, too. And so never been through anything quite like it. It's his hardest experiences you can possibly imagine. I miss her every day, but our faith in Christ is the only thing that allow us to get through it. It's still a basket case at times. But just because I miss my friend but also fills my heart to know no more needles, no more chemo, no more throwing up all night, no more brain tumors, just. She got a new body and she's praising him and she's not thinking about this broken world anymore. So without faith in Christ, I don't know how you get through anything like that.
Henry Kaestner: Thank you very much for sharing. It's very moving. And I really appreciate you sharing that with us. I want to bring it back to you being a dad and really getting the sense that the second season you've been able to really lean into that as your primary role. And my senses, as you talked before we even went online, you talked about the fact your kids were at home with you. What is it look like for you now, having spent so much time coaching athletes that are 20, 21, 22, 23 years old, and now you've got a bunch of kids that age that are at home as adult children? How does this all make you wrap into being a father of adult kids?
Blake Anderson: Well, just my perspective is different in every aspect of my life. Obviously, going through what we've gone through and just cherishing the time, it's a good thing. I've learned to be really efficient with my work, work hard, do a good job. I think I still feel good about the job that I do. But I don't waste time. The minute I can get to step away and spend time with my kids, I will do it. And you're one of the silver linings to Wendy being sick was the kids all you want to also move back home. They both graduated high school or in college, had played ball down the road. Kelly was here going to school. They'd moved out and they moved back home to help and to be around. And so that's if there such a thing as a silver lining to what we went through. I've got back at home. I don't know for how long. But I'm enjoying the time just getting rid of distractions in my lives that just are not important and streamlining things so that I can do a good job at work. I can still enjoy my life and have some hobbies that I enjoy. I like to get outdoors. I like to be around the pool and the water. I like to play golf. I've got rid of all those things that just I'll just put them in their place and just been enjoying a meal, enjoy and go to church on Sunday morning, enjoying being out on the lake or whatever we can do. Just getting every second out of it that I can to make up for the time that I missed earlier in my career and just really just enjoy that we're all here. We're all healthy and we have some time to spend before the chaos of life sets back in.
Henry Kaestner: I want toswitch gears and come back to football a bit and recruiting is very, very clear over this time gaith is the most important thing to you in life. I want to get into some sense about what it looks like being out on the recruiting trail. And some amount of our listeners come over from the Faith Driven Entrepreneur podcast. And effectively, much of what they're trying to do is assemble a team and they're recruiting. They're trying to find the right talent. They're trying to market themselves and market the company and trying to sell something to somebody, selling something to somebody they're recruiting. And you're doing the same thing. What's it look like? You've said in the past that recruiting is about finding the right fit. Where are the lessons you've learned about recruiting over the years and finding the right fit?
Blake Anderson: Well, you know, when I was young in recruiting, I looked for the guy that could run the fastest jump, the highest, you know, just I felt like I could fix any problem. And long as that guy was going to be athlete, we deal with the rest. I think the older and wiser I've gotten, actually, truly, I'm looking for the IT factor, the character, the guy that's gonna fit my personality. The guy's going to fit our culture. A guy that's really going to thrive here.
One of the first things I do is I tell families and I tell kids, just understand, you know, I'm a Christian before I'm anything else, I'm going to do my job in a way that honors God. And if you're concerned about a head coach who's gonna throw a scripture at you or that's gonna pray or pray around you. If that's going to make you uncomfortable, you probably don't need to come play for me. I don't want there to be any doubt in their mind that that's how I'm going to carry muscle. I want them to hold me accountable. I want them when they get here, to expect me to carry myself like a Christian, to expect for me to carry myself in a way that honors God. And so for the very first things that I've talked about in the recruiting process, and if I feel like a kid's not comfortable with that or that he just doesn't want to be around that kind of environment, then we kind of generally move apart from each other. And those that want to be treated that way want to be around that culture of want to be coached in that manner, then those are the ones that I'm want to do everything I can to try to get them here. So, you know, it's just I think just making sure that I'm very upfront with that. Beyond that, I want to tell the truth. You're going to hear the truth even if they don't like to hear it. We're going to work hard. I'm not going to apologize for how we're going to do things right and we're going to be successful. And I think a lot of times in the recruiting process, you get caught up telling people what they want to hear. Trying to recruit them instead of just being truthful and telling them exactly what to expect. And so I just try to take that approach, being honest and almost brutally honest and sometimes even talking guys out of coming to it, because I don't feel like it's going to be the right fit for me, for this place, for how to do things.
Justin Forman: So, Coach, what is that tension like in a public university? You know, we talk to a lot of people, entrepreneurs and others that work for companies that on the outside might not be labeled as Christian. But what is that tension like is you're leading out with your faith in universities both here and other stops on your career that that may or may not embrace those values?
Blake Anderson: Well, it's a state school. And so I'm sure I make our attorney a little uncomfortable at times. And my AD, president and chancellor all have been amazing. Now, you know, I got to be smart. I mean, there's rules that I have to follow and I can't cross the line. I can't and don't try to represent Arkansas State as a Christian school. And our football program is still just a state football program. I just tell him who I am. You know, I am in charge of our football program. But that's just that's my personal belief. That's who I am. And as long as I'm in charge, this is what you can expect from me. But beyond that, you know, the university had been amazing just how supportive they've been.
You know, we just had to be careful about making sure that I continue to share my goals, my vision, my personality, my beliefs, and not try to turn those into the universities. I think that does at times make some people really uncomfortable. But at the same time, you know, I just couldn't do this job any other way. There are athletic directors that are not going to want to hire me for that very reason. And I'm perfectly fine with that. Anybody that looks at me in my career tell them the same thing. Guys, just understand, this is who I'm going to be and that makes you uncomfortable. I probably don't need to be your head coach. I probably don't need to be on your staff. I just know that guys go have a place for us to be. Just not that particular place.
Justin Forman: So, Coach, looking ahead to the next season what gets you excited both about football life, the kids and what's in store?
Blake Anderson: Well, it's just getting to do football again with all my kids here at the houses. It's pretty cool. I know those jobs are short. You know, they're going to be out of the house and on their own and raising kids on their own, not too distant future. So just the opportunity to kind of make another run with them being a part of it. The thing that fires me up is relationships anyway. And so just getting our guys back in and seeing what this group can accomplish every year is different. It's a new challenge, whether it be injuries, whether it be new players, whether it be opponent. You name it, it just you can't really script it, it just kind of happens and you just go out and compete. I love to compete. So I'm excited about just seeing what this group can do, how God's going to use this particular group, where he's going to step in. Who's going to step up and just, you know, hug my kids neck when I come off the field and be able to enjoy it. Because, again, I know just it's short. It didn't last long.
Justin Forman: Yeah. Let me follow up with that one more question before you kind of bring this podcast to a close. But, you know, one of the things that I think obviously crises can do, it can reveal kind of where we are in the journey. You know, you obviously went through some amazing, painful circumstances over the last year or last couple of years. What did that reveal to you as you saw your team, your school? What did that show you about the culture that you guys are building there in Arkansas state?
Blake Anderson: Well, it just really reminded me of what true perspective should be and that, you know, as much as I've always been competitive and don't want to lose in anything, just make sure that I truly have, you know, the right perspective. And that's people that's relationships that's born into the lives of my players and my kids. Those people, all my staff, those that come around me, that's, you know, milking every ounce of that that I can do that through the avenue of football may still be a great coach and still try to win and try to win at the highest level. But, you know, I tell people, you know, there were three things that became very, very evident in our lives, you know, down the stretch that as Wendy was nearing the end and, you know, just kind of brought me back to square one, that meant time goes quick and so do everything you can to not waste any of relationships or what matter that the people around you that you come in contact with my players, my staff, those in the community, my kids, men spend every second. You can't build in those relationships. And the last thing is, I mean, well, the reason we were able to battle through the end and do it was cause we had peace. And knowing that when he was going to bring victory with Christ, I want everybody that I know to know that same peace. And so it's just changed my perspective. And I'm going to still going to coach a five step drop and a poster out and cover three the same. But I think I do it through a different lens at this stage of my life. I do it. No. One, that that's just the avenue that God's given me to reach this particular group of guys. And football's a great place to learn some lessons. And he just shows up every day. So I just think it's taken those things every day and looking for the opportunities that he's present and force.
Justin Forman: Coach, I appreciate you being with us and making time to be a part of the podcast with us as we come to a close, one of the places that we like to finish each episode is really kind of where it all starts and God's word. And so if you could for our listeners, maybe there's a passage of scripture that you've read recently or something that you're taken into this next season that's really coming into life to you. What is really speaking to you in God's word right now?
Blake Anderson: Well, the time of life that I've been in, the thing that keeps coming to me is just Isaiah 41 10, just that I'm not alone and that, you know, God is he's gone straight to me. He's going to hold me up. He's gonna get me through. You know, my father's actually not expected to make it through the next month or two. He's dying as well. Very similar to what Wendy went through. He's on oxygen 24 hours a day, bed bedridden down and lung disease. So I've been clinging to that scripture for the last two years as Wendy was battling cancer. And I'm clinging to it again and just knowing that, you know, he's holding this up and that he's gonna get us through it. And just the reality and the faith that that even when he takes my father home as well, that I'm going to spend eternity with him and that it's very clear to me in the scripture, the second that he takes his last breath, he's gonna be in the presence cry. So those are just the things that right now resonate and allows me to take the next step. You know, each day to get up and get out of bed and not wallow in the loss of your best friend or the loss of your father, which is inevitable at this point. So, you know, that's just that's what I share with people. And this one and I cling to daily.
Henry Kaestner: Coach, thank you very much. You've been very vulnerable and really encouraging through do we really believe in what we say we are? And when you go through the type of trials that you've gone through with Wendy and then with your dad, it reminds us that this is a real faith and we really need to rely on God's word and in a community of believers. And I love the way that you've been faithful to your faith and creating trail and talking to administrators. And you've got a couple new Arkansas state fans here, and you most certainly will among our listener base. And we're both grateful. Thank you very much.
Blake Anderson: I appreciate you guys. It's God's story to tell. I just want to get out of the way and let him speak. And I appreciate you guys giving me the opportunity he's given with the platform. And you guys are going to get it to a lot of. I appreciate you doing that.